Friday 15 April 2016

Vipassana Guatemala: images and memories

A few miscellaneous memories.

The course was the 15th course since the inception of Vipassana Guatemala in 2007, basically propelled forward by a group of local enthusiastic meditators. It was incredible how much effort and time had gone into organising one of these courses without the readymade infrastructure that we enjoy in the West.

The courses are held at Finca La Milagrosa, a large property previously used for religious purposes, though most of the religious paraphernalia is covered with discreet brown paper around the property. The rooms are tidy and clean, though spartan as if one was staying at a monastery - basically a perfect setting.

The gardens are not huge but full of fruit trees and suitable for walking. The men´s side even had a little hill that one could climb, but the women´s side was all flat. Every morning the sunrise would peek over a row of pine trees that lined the front of the property, and some mornings with the misty clouds made for a beautiful sight. The days were warm and the nights modestly cold.

Though I knew exactly was up ahead, I had no idea how this course would go. Each time is so different for so many reasons. The biggest physical struggle for me was an awful thoracic back pain that lasted from Day 3 to Day 6. It was so bad that I considered leaving on Day 3 as I couldn´t imagine sitting there any longer. I imagined all sorts of things wrong with me - did I have an undiagnosed spinal cord tumour? transverse myelitis? my mind really went wild. On Vipassana day I also had a deep pain in my right shoulder (usually my good shoulder!) which stayed with me through that long afternoon session, the first adhittana session. I don´t even know how I got through those sessions when I was in so much pain, but it all passed, as everything always does.

Mentally I had a bad day on day 1 and spent the entire 6pm group meditation session crying. It stopped at some time though, the tears dried, and I realised that tears are really made of salt because they made crystalline tracks down my face. There is also a trajectory for tears - they fall down your face and land in a certain way. The rest of the days were not bad, around day 5 I started thinking of all the children whose deaths I had seen. I spent time recalling them and their families, and said goodbye to them in my head. The day after that I did the dying adults (not so many memorable ones) and the day after that I did all the grievances during my training. Then I asked myself if there were other outstanding issues, and worked through those. After that I felt like I was free and unburdened.

Coming out of silence is always really hard for me. The first time in 2003 I was overwhelmed and like most new students, I just went around chattering with everyone and anyone. The second time in 2013 I spent most of the day walking and talking with Kim, a much gentler emergence. This time I had gone to the course with the other Aussie girls Emma and Brei so I spent a lot of the day talking to them, but also met a few other people. It was awfully noisy. My throat was so scratchy and I found it a great effort to talk. But before we knew it, it was the morning of day 11, another beautiful day to head out into the Guatemalan sunshine, to our separate adventures.





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